My Three Wishes

Like most adults, the day had come when I felt incapacitated by my to-do list. I had homework, housework, a puppy to manage, and a husband to bond with and I didn't know where to start. I ended up breaking down in the shower, and as I talked to myself, I came up with my three wishes. They weren't general helps, like more patience or more time; I wanted someone to walk Zoe, to make dinner, and to wash the mountain of dishes. Everything else, I felt I could manage. If Zoe wasn't jumping on me, I could study better. If the mountain of dishes wasn't judging me, I could clean the rest of the apartment in peace, etc. If only someone could come and magically grant my wishes. 

My wishes were granted, but it wasn't magic. I messaged my husband, letting him know that I couldn't make dinner, so he could decide if he wanted to get something or make something. He came home and cooked! Wish number one. I found an assignment that involved watching a documentary and watched that as I washed the dishes. Wish number two. The next day, I decided that it was important to take time for Zoe, so I took her on a walk. Wish number three! When I realized that I had granted my own wishes (with help from my husband), it was so empowering. I had managed to grant not only those wishes but finish my other responsibilities as well. It reminded me of one of my favorite quotes, by Phillip Brooks:
“Do not pray for easy lives. Pray to be stronger men. Do not pray for tasks equal to your powers. Pray for powers equal to your tasks. Then the doing of your work shall be no miracle, but you shall be the miracle."

In Numbers 14, Moses and the children of Israel finally have the Promised Land within their reach. But then the spies that Moses sent to scout for the fruits of the land come back with bad news--the land is already populated by giant, strong men. The spies and many of the people lose faith in the power of God and despair. "Would God that we had died in the land of Egypt! or would God we had died in this wilderness!" (vs. 2). How incredible that these people, having seen all they have seen of God's power, would give up on Him. The Lord says, "how long will it be ere they believe me, for all the signs which I have shewed among them?" (vs. 11) Joshua and Caleb try to reassure them and reanimate their faith: "The land, which we passed through to search it, is an exceeding good land. If the Lord delight in us, then he will bring us into this land, and give it us; a land which floweth with milk and honey. Only rebel not ye against the Lord, neither fear ye the people of the land..." (vs. 7-9)

Sometimes life is overwhelming. Our Promised Land might look beautiful, but it requires faith and work to get there. Are we willing to trust in the Lord? Are we willing to look past the challenges and into the beauty that we're fighting for?

There is a second part to the story from Numbers 14. After being told that they wouldn't be able to enter the Promised Land, a group of people decided not to wait. They decided to go in their own strength to take the land. Moses warned them that they were going against the word of God and wouldn't have Him with them. But they went anyway and were killed.  

At the time when I made my three wishes, I was preparing for a book discussion on "The Tao of Pooh," which discusses Taoism and finding peace according to Winnie the Pooh. One of my favorite parts tells a fable of a river that is so wild and fast and full of rocks, that anyone who entered the river died. But one day, a boy saw an old man in the water, bobbing up and down. The boy called for help, but the old man emerged unscathed. When asked how he did it, the old man replied that he had learned long ago to go with the flow of the river, to submit to its superior power. 

We might become impatient as we are working towards our blessings. At those times, we should remember to seek the will of God. He has the power to help us, but we need to trust in His plan and His timing. 

Seeds of Faith

In the Book of Mormon, a prophet named Alma teaches about faith using the symbolism of a seed. When we receive the word of God, we should plant it in our hearts and nourish it (learn it, understand it, and act on it). When we do this, when we "nourish the tree ... it shall take root; and behold it shall be a tree springing up unto everlasting life.
"And because of your diligence and your faith and your patience with the word in nourishing it, ... by and by ye shall pluck the fruit thereof, which is most precious, which is sweet above all that is sweet, and which is white above all that is white, yea, and pure above all that is pure; and ye shall feast upon this fruit even until ye are filled, that ye hunger not, neither shall ye thirst."

As I was discussing this the other day, I thought about different seeds  I have planted (literally, in actual dirt). Growing up, we had a garden and I learned that it was very easy to grow tomatoes and pumpkins. You just need to give them dirt, keep them warm and watered, and then harvest what grows.
At one point I decided I wanted to grow an apple tree from seed. Now that is a much more complicated process. From what I remember, you need to first get the seeds from a couple of different apples, put them in a moist paper towel, and keep them in the fridge until they start to sprout. Then you put them in a planter and need to give them a certain amount of water and sunlight. At that point my seeds died so I never learned what happens next, but I think you see my point.

Certain principles and truths are easier to accept and have faith in than others. For me, it was easy to accept the Book of Mormon as the word of God. When I read it I felt the Spirit, it makes me want to be a better person. So it must be of God.
Other things--like if Joseph Smith was  prophet, why bad things happen to good people, etc-- were more difficult for me to learn and I needed to put time, thought, study, and prayer into discovering whether or not they were true.

I know that as we seek to grow our faith in the word of God, we will be able to begin to taste the blessings He promises us. We will be "filled, that ye hunger not, neither shall ye thirst." We will be able to "hope for a better world, yea, even a place at the right hand of God, which hope cometh of faith, maketh an anchor to the souls of men..." (Ether 12:4). Sometimes it will be a quick witness and sometimes it will take more effort, but it will always be worth the price.

The Anti-Nephi-Lehies

One of the most inspiring stories in the Book of Mormon is the story of the Anti-Nephi-Lehies--also known as the people of Ammon.
These people were Lamanites who had separated themselves from the other Lamanites because they had been converted and now believed in God. The other Lamanites were angry with the Anti-Nephi-Lehies. They probably felt betrayed and confused by the change in their friends and former brothers-in-arms. The Lamanites prepared to go to war against the Anti-Nephi-Lehies.
When the Anti-Nephi-Lehies heard about the preparations, they were naturally scared. The king and the prophet counseled together and with God to decide what to do. They felt inspired that they should not fight against the Lamanites.
In fact, they gathered together all of the people and challenged them to make a covenant with God: that they would never raise a weapon against anyone ever again. As a symbol of that covenant, every single person took their weapons and threw them into a pit, burying them where they couldn't be reached.
When the Lamanites were ready, they came and attacked the Anti-Nephi-Lehies. As they'd agreed, the Anti-Nephi-Lehies didn't fight back. Instead they knelt down and prayed to Heavenly Father.

22 And thus without meeting any resistance, they did slay (1,005) of them; and we know that they are blessed, for they have gone to dwell with their God.
23 Now when the Lamanites saw that their brethren would not flee from the sword, neither would they turn aside to the right hand or to the left, but that they would lie down and perish, and praised God even in the very act of perishing under the sword—
24 Now when the Lamanites saw this they did forbearfrom slaying them; and there were many whose hearts hadswollen in them for those of their brethren who had fallen under the sword, for they repented of the things which they had done.
25 And it came to pass that they threw down their weapons of war, and they would not take them again, for they were stung for the murders which they had committed; and they came down even as their brethren, relying upon the mercies of those whose arms were lifted to slay them.
26 And it came to pass that the people of God were joined that day by more than the number who had been slain; and those who had been slain were righteous people, therefore we have no reason to doubt but what they were saved. (Alma 24)

 When I read through this story last, I had a few cool thoughts I'd like to share.
I wondered why, when Heavenly Father had saved so many people who placed their trust in Him, He chose not to save the Anti-Nephi-Lehies. Then I remembered that only a generation after these people came the 2,000 Stripling Warriors (read that story here). These young men were protected by the mighty power of God... and maybe by 1,005 angels as well.
The example of faith that their uncles, fathers, mothers, sisters, aunts, grandparents, cousins, and many others who died for their covenants must have also been a powerful force for the young men.

Finally, I thought of the question in "The War Room" (amazing movie, you should watch it). "Do I just let him walk all over me?"
The Anti-Nephi-Lehies not only were walked over, they were killed.

For a man to lay down his all, his character and reputation, his honor, and applause, his good name among men, his houses, his lands, his brothers and sisters, his wife and children, and even his own life also—counting all things but filth and dross for the excellency of the knowledge of Jesus Christ—requires more than mere belief or supposition that he is doing the will of God; but actual knowledge, realizing that, when those sufferings are ended, he will enter into eternal rest, and be a partaker of the glory of God.   ~Joseph Smith

Although many of the Anti-Nephi-Lehies were killed, many more people were converted. And through the scriptures we can know that those who were killed were taken up to heaven.

This story has come to mean much more to me. To me it is now a story of how a large group of people, unified in faith, can find new life through conversion and through the resurrection.

"The Object of this Life is to Learn"

There's an amazing article by Jeffrey R Holland called "A School in Zion." In it, he quotes Brigham Young who said, "The object of this life is to learn."
What do you think about that? Did Heavenly Father really send us down here just so we could learn?
If He did, what are we supposed to learn?

seek learning even by study and also by faith  ~D&C 109:7

What does that mean? To learn by faith.
Perhaps He's telling us to learn with the thought of Him on our minds. Perhaps He's saying that any study can be applied to a gospel principle.
It's a question that I haven't found a solid answer to. Maybe there isn't a solid answer.
Maybe it's just the idea of keeping our secular learning joined with our spiritual learning.

After reading the quote "the object of this life is to learn," I was reminded of something I learned in my college class. The best way to learn something is to teach it. You're 80% more likely to remember something you've taught over something you've read.
Think about this with the gospel. The best way to learn it is to teach it. That may be why there is such a great focus on missionary work.
I know that as I teach I have learned more effectively. I have also felt the spirit more strongly when I'm teaching or participating.
Heavenly Father will bless you as you teach or as you "study by faith." He sent you here to learn, to experience. He wants to be with you so that He can guide you through your trials.

"In school the lesson comes before the test. In life the test comes before the lesson."
Let Him help you through your test. It won't be easy, but He will make it easier.

Grace Series Part 6: Like Tuning a Violin

I was tuning my violin the other day, when I ran out of fine tuner. In case you're unfamiliar with how to tune a violin, there is a fine tuner and a tuning peg. The fine tuners are what you'll usually use, they refine the note until it's perfect. If it's really out of tune you'll use your tuning peg.

So I had turned my fine tuner to the lowest it could go. I knew what to do, I'd done it before. You bring your string out of tune by twisting the fine tuner until it's about half way and then you use your tuning pegs to bring it back to the relative area.
As I did that, I realized that this is what God is doing to us. We are so close to getting something great or becoming something wonderful, and then suddenly it seems everything is going wrong or all of Satan's forces are attacking us.

It's like the arrow analogy:

A Time and a Season

This fun song is based off of a section of the Bible: Ecclesiastes 3:1-8.
1 To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven:
2 A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted;
3 A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up;
4 A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance;
5 A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;
6 A time to get, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away;
7 A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;
8 A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace.

I feel like I've been in one of those "times" of my life. Usually I feel a great drive to study and to improve myself academically, or to study the scriptures hardcore. But for the past few months I've felt at peace with just crocheting, listening to talks or cds, and playing with my family. At first I balked, and tried to get a lot of studying done; but that always left me burned out and unfulfilled after only a couple hours. 

As I was looking for a picture to describe how I felt, I was looking for doves, because to me, they symbolize peace. But even pictures of doves in flight felt like they were too active to describe my "time." So I picked this one, of one dove nurturing the other

I have done a few self discovering exercises, and have learned things about myself and my purpose. I've been able to focus on getting ready for college and my LDS mission. 

It's been really strange, as I said. I'm not used to this slow of a pace. But I think it's a good thing. I'm about to spend 18 months on go go go mode and in uncomfortable situations, so right now it feels like Heavenly Father is giving me a little restful period. "A time to gather strength."

Peace be unto You Because of your Faith

This week, I posted the scripture Helaman 5:47 on my wall.

"Peace, peace be unto you because of your faith in my Well Beloved, who was from the foundation of the world."

Today in family scripture study, we read about Alma (senior) and his people living peacefully before the Lamanites came and captured them. Someone pointed out that Alma and his people were righteous and listened to the Lord whenever He commanded them to do something. On the other hand, King Limhi's people (the ones who stayed behind when Alma and his followers fled) were sketchy at best.
But both groups were brought into bondage. The good guys and the not-so-good guys.
Why would following God's directions lead Alma's people into bondage?

When I think about the differences between these two groups, a few things stand out.
First of all, because each of these groups was brought into bondage they were motivated and given the opportunity to get back to Zarahemla to join the rest of the Nephites.
Secondly, while the people of Limhi were in captivity many of them died because of the many wars they fought. But the people of Alma were close to the Lord and knew the correct actions to take. When the people of Limhi were finally humbled and converted, they didn't have anyone with the authority to baptize them or receive revelation for them. But the people of Alma were almost all already baptized and close to God.

As we have a foundation of faith, I know we are able to find peace in our trials.

More Scriptures

Death is a scary thing.
So it might be weird that I've spent the last five minutes looking up scriptures on death.
But the scriptures offer a lot of comfort.

If you've lost a love one recently, have moments of grief remembering someone who's passed away, or if you have a friend who needs help coping with loss turn to the scriptures. They provide simple truths about the reality of death; not the giant wall our human minds have set up, but the doorway it is meant to be.

Here are some of the scriptures I found, and a basic summary next to them:

Alma 14:11 (those unjustly killed)

24:21, 26 (those killed as civilians in a war)

40:12 (state of paradise)

46:39 (having faith)

46:41 (those dying of old age)

56:11 (soldiers)

D&C 42:46 (righteous death)

101:36 (joy after death)

122:9 (days are numbered)

Grace Series Part 5-- "Love of Christ" 1 Corinthians 8:35-39

35 Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword?
... 37 Nay, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him that loved us.
38 For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come,
39 Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

12 Days of Easter Day 12-- The 2nd Coming

I decided to share a paper I wrote quite a while ago about the Second Coming, and what my feelings were.
http://2ndcomingfearsandfun.blogspot.com/

I hope you had a wonderful easter; that you were able to feel the Spirit and appreciate the Savior and His Atonement.

Fear vs. Faith, Hope, and Charity

FEAR is a scary word. It paralyzes our potential; it stops our success; and it can contaminate our character.
Fear is one of the devil's main weapons. How can we fight against it?

I have three words for you: faith, hope, and charity.
Any one of those principles will get rid of your fear, and lead you on to the next principle.

*   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *

"Power of Hope"

Faith of Abinadi
Through the years we learn that challenges to our faith are not new, and they aren’t likely to disappear soon. But true disciples of Christ see opportunity in the midst of opposition.

In the Book of Mormon, the prophet Abinadi was bound and brought before the evil King Noah. Although the king vigorously opposed Abinadi and eventually sentenced him to death, Abinadi boldly taught the gospel and bore his testimony anyway. Because Abinaditook advantage of that opportunity, a priest named Alma was converted to the gospel and brought many souls unto Christ. The courage of Abinadi and Alma was Christian courage.


1 John 4:18 
There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear: because fear hath torment. He that feareth is not made perfect in love.


Finally, the perfect example of fearlessness: Christ.
    One of the symptoms of fear is sleeplessness; Christ could sleep through a storm. Think about that.
Calming the Tempest

Just a quick thought...

“There is not one of us but what God’s love has been expended upon. There is not one of us that He has not cared for and caressed. There is not one of us that He has not desired to save, and that He has not devised means to save. There is not one of us that He has not given His angels charge concerning. We may be insignificant and contemptible in our own eyes, and in the eyes of others, but the truth remains that we are the children of God, and that He has actually given His angels—invisible beings of power and might—charge concerning us, and they watch over us and have us in their keeping.”
-- Pres George Q Cannon
(Click here to view the entire talk by Pres. Eyring)

Christmas Character spotlight: MARY

Mary is a hero to many. She is to me! She was worthy to be the Mother of Christ. And she had the courage to accept that calling from the Angel.

Luke 1:37 For with God, nothing is impossible.

In the culture back then, if you were pregnant outside of marriage, you would be severly punished. Both Mary and Joseph must've struggled.

And then the glorious night in Bethlehem!

To sum up, this is one of my favorite songs, and the video is really powerful, too: "Breath of Heaven" by Amy Grant

 

I know that Mary was chosen to bear Jesus, and that she had great courage and faith to accept that, and follow through. I know that she is a daughter of God, and that she played an important part in His plan.

Not Neccessarily Christmas....

This is my new favorite Bible Video that the LDS Church has made:

Twelve Years

A Retelling of Mark 5 and Luke 8 by Tova
All scripture references are taken from the King James Version of the Bible

I stare at him in shock. This feeling I've had, inside of me, is bleeding? It can be fixed, he says... with a miracle. 

*** 

That same day... 

Looking at my wife, I smile; then turn back to my little girl, my firstborn. She smiles at me.  

"We did it, Jairus," I hear my wife say. "We've been blessed." 

I nod to her. Gently taking her hand, I squeezed it with the force of my love. This child filled something in me that I hadn't know was void. 

*** 

Twelve years later... 

Oh please, Messiah! Come, take me away from here! Save my daughter!  

All night I have worked, my husband beside me. All night, yet still she fades. Our only one, our blessing. 

Please, Messiah! Please! 

The Messiah. 

I turn to my husband, "Jairus, search out Jesus. Find Him, beg Him to come." 

Briskly nodding, he steps out, and leaves. I turn back to our daughter-- pale, on the threshold of death. 

*** 

I must get to Him. He can heal my daughter. No matter what the Pharisees say; No matter if I lose my place in the synagogue; I must find Him 

*** 

The man from the synagogue hurries past me. I can barely touch his hem as he rushes past. I am too weak to go many places now. I just sit here, focusing on living.  

Too many physicians. Too many herbs. My issue is just the same, or worse, than it was twelve years ago. I just wait here for my chance; for my time.  

The lepers speak of Him, as do those who were lame. Jesus of Nazareth, the Savior. He can heal me. I must wait for Him. Even if I only touch His cloak, that will be enough. I just need Him near. 

*** 

Stretching, I step off of the ship. Across the sea, I'd just seen a mad man freed from the legion of devils which had bound him. Musing, I looked at the man walking in front of me, meeting the people. Nothing much on the outside, a normal face and stature. Yet inside, you could tell, He was pure, radiant, loving, innocent, guiltless, and all other things good. Whenever His eyes rested on me, I knew He knew me, and loved me in spite of that. A feeling rose up with in me, which I'd come to recognize. It was the feeling He brought, and that thoughts of Him brought. It rose from my heart into my throat, and tried to express itself, but my mind understood that there was no words which could conjure this feeling, except words expressed by Him. 

A man is racing through the crowd, right up to the Master. Falling on his knees, he cries out, "Lord, my little daughter lies at the point of death: I pray thee, come and lay thy ahands on her, that she may be healed; and she shall live" 

How amazing that this man, a ruler of the synagogue-- where many have rejected the Master-- should show such faith. 

Of course, the Master agrees, and follows the man. The crowd follows us, pushing in from all sides. 

*** 

I can see an unusual crowd coming. Could it be? Yes! I see Him! He is at the front, smiling, with His hands reaching out; comforting, accepting gifts. Where His hands can not reach, His eyes go. Bridges of light offering love to one and all.  

I don't ask for His hands, or even for a glance from His eyes. I just need a bit of his garment, a brief contact, and I will be whole.  

He's approaching. I gather my strength. Just one moment... please.... It happens! Through the crowd, I reach, and barely catch the tip. I feel a surge coming in me, and my bleeding stops. 

*** 

The Master is no longer following the ruler. He's looking around. What could He be looking for? 

"Who touched me?" 

Confused, I ask Him, "Thou sees the multitude thronging thee, and sayest thou, Who touched me?" 

"Somebody hath touched me: for I perceive that power as gone out of me." 

Power. Had some devil come? Or was it something more simple, more righteous? 

*** 

He's searching the crowd. Could He have perceived my small touch? I didn't disturb Him, did I? I never meant to cause trouble. I never even spoke.  

Soon, He will see me. Trembling, I step forward, and our eyes meet. All my fear washes away with those love-bright eyes. I tell Him what I'd done, and why.  

"Daughter, be of good cheer. Thy faith hath made thee whole; go in peace." 

*** 

As the Master speaks, a servant runs up to the ruler--Jairus-- who has been waiting impatiently behind us. I catch their whispered words: "Thy daughter is dead. Trouble not the Master." Turning, I can see the ruler's face fill with despair. He nearly drops, but miraculously, the Master is there. 

"Fear not, only believe, and she shall be made whole." 

*** 

"Whole" I hear the word, floating above my dark thoughts. I look at the woman, the cause of this delay. She had just been made whole. Maybe the Lord could make my daughter that way, too. Alive. Happy. Whole.  

*** 

Oh Messiah! Oh my daughter! 

He did not come! Jairus... he was not here.  

My daughter! The last feverish throws! Oh, horrid memory!  

Why are these people here. Trying to seem sad, beggars in rich clothes. Oh my daughter! 

Messiah! Bring her back! Please, bring her back to me! 

*** 

Three of us follow the Master and Jairus: Peter, my brother John, and myself. Working our way from one crowd to the next mob-- the one surrounding Jairus' house.  

Distinctly, we hear the tumult, sounding like one, loud, confused noise. Above the minstrels and mourners, the Master casts his voice.  

"Give place, why make ye this ado, and weep? The maid is not dead, but sleepeth." 

*** 

Who is this man, to disturb us? 

We have seen the girl, there is no breath in her. Does he take us for fools? 

He is deserving of ridicule, and mockery.  

The audacity! This common man, never seen before in this house, presumes to make us leave.  

The master of the house does nothing. He just wallows in his own sadness as we are escorted away.  

The audacity! 

*** 

Oh my daughter! The Messiah has not come! 

The noise dims around me dims. I look up from my daughter's death bed. 

Through my tears, I see a man, light radiating from him. He approaches, and I turn back to my child, and lay, weeping, across her still body. 

*** 

The hope that first woke in my heart on seeing the woman made whole has grown.  

This man could heal my daughter. Still, seeing her eerie quietness, I cannot help but cry. I go to kneel by my wife, one hand on her shoulder, the other on my child's knee. 

*** 

"Talitha Cumi. Damsel, I say unto thee, arise." 

Through my sobs, I feel a different throb. My daughter stirs. 

*** 

The three of us look at each other, astonished at the power the Master holds. To be able to raise from the dead... what a wonder. What a gift for these two parents, who are now embracing the maid.  

Finally, they remember who has blessed them, and they turn to the master. 

He tells them to tell no one what had happened. 

Then, with a gentle smile, he reminded them that the maid should have something to eat.